10 Clever and Funny Puns

By Gloson On April 22, 2009 Under Humor
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I read a lot of puns, recently. They were so funny I thought I might like to share them with you. Here are the top ten funniest and hilarious puns I have picked for you.

(None are in particular order)

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.

2. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.

3. The dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.

4. Let’s talk about rights and lefts. You’re right, so I left.

5. When William joined the army, he disliked the phrase ‘fire at will’.

6. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

7. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

8. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

9. He drove his expensive car into a tree and found out how the Mercedes bends.

10. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.

Bonus: Another 10 Funny Puns!

Update: Since I found out that this is one of the most visited blog posts on this blog, I’ve decided to post 10 more great puns for you! I hope you’ll enjoy them! icon smile 10 Clever and Funny Puns

1. If you want to make money as a comedian you gotta have the cents of humor.

2. What do you call a marketplace that sells weird stuff? A bizarre bazaar!

3. Being struck by lightning is a really shocking experience!

4. The Hungary Wales Seattled down and Finnished their lunch, Hamburg-ers with Chiles.

5. A bicycle cannot stand on its own because it is two-tired.

6. “What’s purple and 5000 miles long?” “Ooh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”

7. How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!

8. Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Uhm… how do you drive this thing?”

9. The reason he didn’t become a juggler was… he hadn’t got the balls to do it!

10. “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present.” – Kung Fu Panda

I love puns! If you know any more funny puns, please feel free to leave one in the comments section below. I’ll feature some good ones here! icon smile 10 Clever and Funny Puns

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My Funny Poetry Book: Creative & Funny Poetry for Kids

I hope you’ve enjoyed those 10 funny puns above! icon biggrin 10 Clever and Funny Puns If you did, then perhaps you might like to get my book, Creative & Funny Poetry for Kids, which I wrote when I was 9 years old.

It contains 20 creative funny poems accompanied with colorful illustrations to make you and your kids laugh and giggle! Please click the book below for more details.

3Dbooksmall 10 Clever and Funny Puns

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22 Comments Add yours

  1. Sundareswaran
    April 23, 2009
    12:13 am

    Wow! These are funny puns. I love them. Keep up the good work :)

    Sundareswaran’s last blog post..My Hollow Form!

  2. Pramit J. Nathan
    April 23, 2009
    1:48 pm

    This is a great Post :-) Have shared it on my facebook profile… Thanks!

    • Gloson
      April 23, 2009
      5:22 pm

      Thank you for sharing it on your facebook profile. I hope this post benefited your friends, too.

      • aidan11
        April 23, 2009
        9:41 pm

        Nice puns! Im gonna go post some on my facebook profile too! Your really funny,

  3. Simon | Teenius
    May 3, 2009
    8:57 pm

    Cool list, Gloson :D Number 2 and 5 were my favourites :D

    Simon | Teenius’s last blog post..Top Tips For More Twitter Followers

  4. Farrhad A
    May 3, 2009
    9:00 pm

    Hahahaha :D
    I just love puns, great list bud!

    Loving your blog :)

  5. Jenelle
    May 6, 2009
    7:46 am

    I personally like the first one. Very nice collection though ^^

  6. Lina
    May 27, 2009
    4:44 pm

    Haha! Those are hilarious! I love puns, they are so.. fun!

    Lina’s last blog post..What types of maxi dresses do you have?

    • Gloson
      May 28, 2009
      1:26 am

      Haha! I wish there are more better ones. :P Those are the best ten I’ve seen so far…

  7. Corey Freeman
    May 30, 2009
    8:18 pm

    This was really funny! Number 5 is my favorite! ;)

    Corey Freeman’s last blog post..5 Important Reasons Why People WILL Hire You for Freelance Writing Jobs

  8. Isaac | GoBlogger
    December 24, 2009
    12:39 pm

    LOL they are funny and smart!! I enjoyed most of them.

  9. MangaMooo
    June 13, 2010
    12:56 am

    I have another pun: Person 1: Hey look the keyboard says that U and I are toghether. Person 2: Yeah, but look underneath, it says JK!

  10. Brian George
    October 31, 2010
    1:03 am

    1. There’s report of a hole in the nudist colony wall. The police are looking into it

    2. I couldn’t figure out why the ball looked like it was getting bigger, then it hit me

  11. ALii
    February 9, 2011
    2:38 pm

    i used some of these puns for my school project :) miss loved them :) thanx

  12. Ruchiccio
    November 21, 2011
    9:36 am

    One eye said to the other, “Just between you and me, there’s something that smells.”

    Thanks for posting this list! I frequently scour the web for puns to use when I write my limericks. I just used one of yours now for this new limerick I wrote:

    When his squadron was having a drill,
    Soldier William would always feel ill
    If commanders cried out,
    “Practice shooting about,
    However you like. Fire at will!”

    If you’re interested in writing limericks, I invite you to check out The OEDILF project which writes limericks on every word of the dictionary. http://www.oedilf.com

  13. anyssa garza
    December 4, 2011
    1:43 am

    I really love yur pund there so clever and funny i also go t some
    puns of my own

    1There were two hats on the rack, one said to the other:you hang there
    im gonna go on a head

    2 Dont lie to the people who take yur xrays, they see right through you

    Hope ya like them :p

  14. Katie P
    June 15, 2012
    10:23 am

    These are punny.

    See what I did there? ;)

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